Male Sexual Arousal Disorder
Performance anxiety, erectile dysfunction (difficulty obtaining and/or maintaining erection), premature ejaculation and delayed ejaculation are different types of male arousal disorder. Usually, the main source of all these difficulties is psychological; however, it is important to rule out physical sources.
Society has been kind of unfair to men by placing unrealistic norms and expectations on men in regards to their sexual performance. In many cultures male sexuality and virility is a sign of “manhood”. Pleasing the female sexual partner at every sexual interaction and being able to maintain your erection just long enough that is suiting your sexual partner is expected. In other words, society and cultures have fed us with many myths and misconceptions in regards to male sexuality and their “sexual performance”. As a result, many young men are affected by theses sexual pressures placed on them by the social norms and even though many of these norms have changed many young men continue to hold onto them and believing they must be certain way in regards to sexual performance.
It is important to erase all these expectations placed on men and give sex and sexuality a new look. Sex is about pleasure, has no norms and boundaries as long as both partners consent to the act. Women and men both carry the same level of responsibility in initiating sex and pleasing each other. Sexual act is not a performance but an act, during which both partners have the same goal: pleasure and reproduction for some couples.
That being said, there is no shame in not being able to maintain or obtain erection, in having premature or delayed ejaculation. It is important to identify the source(s) of the problem and remove all the sexual fears and replace them with positive sexual thoughts and phantasies. Remember that stress, fatigue, and long working hours are common sources of sexual problems. Often seeing a psychologist can help you identify the source of the problem and offer coping skills such as stress management and cognitive restructuring (modifying your negative thought patterns).
